A Need for Healing?

A few days back while paying a visit to the Kolkata Book Fair, I stumbled upon an interesting statistics. Visiting just the first 5-6 stalls made me take particular notice of the fact that a certain genre of books are flooding the stalls, a genre which has been more inconspicuous in the yesteryears. In fact, it has been making inroads for the past few years, but now suddenly it seems to have gained some real momentum. I'm talking about the genre of books aiming to bring the readers to "real" "happiness"/"satisfaction" in their lives. The books on "true happiness", to become "successful", to become universally appreciated, to find the "truth" of life, and so on.

So, all that naturally lead to the most obvious question - are people really that much unhappy about their present states? Is that possible or at all imaginable? I mean, if those books are so much on display, they must be selling. If the void these books aim to fill really exists, then the world must indeed be a very sordid place to live in - with people being totally unhappy, being frustrated about their career, and not having a clue as to what is happening around and why - including their own roles!! Now, that's a disconcerting thought!!

Otherwise, the authors (and/or publishers) must be imagining all these! Or trying to sell this idea. Now, how pitiful can that be - a 'sadist' author trying to sell you his solution to a path of eternal happiness? Beats me!! Tickles me too!!

And now that I have touched upon this subject - its not limited to books at book-fair - its making round everywhere. For example those mail forwards I'm sure everyone receives (outnumbered only by spams) which are always telling you how to be happy and all that! Ok, agreed that they felt pretty nice when I first started receiving them ... but receiving mails on how be happy, how to make friends, what is, and what is not, for 3-4 years constantly (and also repeatedly - many repeats), kind of beats the happiness out of me. And I find things getting quiet original in their perspectives. For instance, I have seen the notion of friendship getting reduced to all sorts of things in those "value of friend" mails - crutches to lean upon, tissue papers (no - they didn't say it was to clean your a** - it was for wiping your tears, but I guess the former was implied as well... after all, your friends often clean up your mess, don't they?) and so on.

Anyways, these books/emails, etc cater to a very small fraction of the population of my own country at least. So we are still hale and hearty I suppose. I will assume that safely. Anyways, sorrowful or not - the world is always interesting and funny place to live in. Besides, these satisfactions and lessons these books proclaim to offer, are actually everywhere, all around us - ours for the taking whenever we want it! So why bother!

The Experience of "Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire"

The digital age, with all the latest innovations and advances in audio and video technologies, is now capable of delivering us a breathtaking movie experience right within the comfort of our comfy couch in the drawing room. So how would you feel when you go paying for the ticket to a movie hall, to experience in large the audiovisual extravaganza of the latest Harry Potter movie, but then only to discover in alarm that the picture in the screen is clearly lacking in proper illumination(!!) - it has got too much noise in it - the audio is so full of noise that at some places you completely miss what is being said and then lastly, you desperately start scanning the hall ticket looking for that "Dolby Digital" or "DTS" sign...!!

Under such circumstances, even the most prudent and careful ones risk an element of bias while forming the opinion about the movie, and yours truly (the individual in the situation being none other) is but a common movie-goer lacking in all the finer aspects of movie appreciation, with which the critics are fortuned. Consequently, every care will be taken to keep the opinion of the movie as neutral as possible.

First of all, the cast is more star-studded this time. Also the prime roles (the young actors) have grown up, both in age and acting, keeping pace with the book characters. The performances of the other characters seem very much like that of the previous ones. In terms of adhering to the original plot of the book, this movie definitely ranks before all its predecessors. Curtailing details are a must when the book has to be shown within three hours, but the choices seem to have captured perfectly the all the important aspects of the book. This is unlike previous releases, when some of the important events have invariably been blundered each time.

The tricky part, of course, is commenting on the audio and video special effects. In spite of the detestable hall conditions, using a bit of imagination and a bit of rationale, the video effects can be considered at least as good as, if not sometimes even better, compared to the previous Potter releases. There are certain breathtaking scenes during the 'TriWizard Tournament' - in which Harry is a participant. The audio experience was simply bad but that can probably be safely attributed to the hall. It is highly unlikely, and also unheard of, that an excellent video treat has not been accompanied with matching audio treatment.

So in total, this movie scores above the previous Harry Potter releases, and if someone had enjoyed those, he/she will definitely enjoy this one. The only checklist - of course - be careful while choosing the hall!!

Exams Over - But Still Wrapped Up!!

Exams are over. Time should have been ample, but they are not. Have got to do a still lot more stuff than I had to manage during the exams. I'm leaving for Sandakphu trekking on 27th. That gives me just three days in the immediate present. Three days to manage a lot. Well, one of those days is over and I have managed some. In the next two days, I have to do the planning for the journey, do shopping, pack up my stuff, visit the tourism department office for information (the nature and orientation of the journey being completely new), complete a due office work and also spend some time with friends. Hope I haven't missed anything there. Today I did some shopping and visited a friend's place. Err... where is my time for resting? My last exam was yesterday.... and even yesterday, I had some work to do after the exams. I miss the loong one full day's sleep I normally indulge myself with, after exams and sorts.

Its been a tight schedule for me right from the start of December. Practical exams started then, and unlike the other times, this time I did not beforehand know my practical stuff. They were also such, that unless I knew the theory, I would not be able do the practicals, and so I had to study. Then, of course, the theory exams started and I had to study strenuously - having never studied the whole semester round. And this time the subjects were not easily done, or known - except only two (or maybe three) papers out of six in which I had previous introduction. And now after exams are over, it seems I have got a tighter schedule. The trek tour would last till maximum 7th Jan, after which I am attending a course on 'Soft Computing' at Center for Soft Computing Research at ISI Kolkata from 10-15th January. So, as soon as I come back, I have to start studying full-time on this topic - I expect the level of discussion up there to be of proper standards (the list of participants includes all the good institutions like IITs, NITs, etc - with both faculties and students). So, I guess, if I want to understand anything of what will pass, I'll have to do proper homeworks. And after 15th January, I again have to get indulged in my college Tech Fest activities, and along with that, I also have a office work already scheduled. Again, tightly wrapped!! And yeah - the words are out there that the campussing will start from February this time. And I'm totally unprepared - my technical status is at one of its minimum - haven't studied seriously anything since I got in MCA - just have done only enough to dodge the exams. Now if campussing really starts in February, that would be the cream of the lot!!

If that does happen, chances are really sour that I'll see through the technical round (leave alone the HR round - wont even reach that, I suppose) - and I wonder how I would be then, considering the air with which I have been walking around all these time, completely denouncing the current standards being followed in college and everywhere, not at all taking seriously the exams and marks, saying that marks mean nothing - the real stuff is inside you and the companies test that only, as if I have all the real standards and I know all the real things, and very few people were my equal (sic!). Funny - I feel queer even imagining that. Now, even with all my liberal mindset, that is an experience I surely do not want to taste - I'm positive about that.

Will I be really relaxed and free in February even? Probably not, because already I'm hearing talks about new office works, and I have stated that I wont be able to take them up before February. So, I'll have to improvise, I guess, as usual.

Well, before this becomes much too longer, I'll end this here. I'm writing after a long time though.

Scribbles: 29th November, 2005

Sometimes I just feel to write. For no reasons whatsoever. Like now. I'm writing just because I suddenly felt to start typing some words. And exactly so I'm doing now, it seems. Literally typing just words - they make no sense, convey no message, or have any purpose. Useless, are they? Maybe.... maybe not. Doesn’t matter to me, at least not now. In fact, they are serving their purpose very well - letting me do what I wanted to do. In the process, probably providing my some satisfaction - though of what kind, or why, I know not. So I guess, they are not so much without purpose, are they?

Does everything have a purpose in this world? Does everything have to have a purpose? Yeeahh... I'm harping back on the abstract again. Anyways, I don’t know the answers - of course. I guess, nobody will ever know. Besides, you only rotate in a circle if you ever try to get answers to such questions, don’t you? Well, I do. So, I'll leave it at that. For now at least.

Exams ahead. And as usual, I've got LOADS to study. Everything left till the last moments. Now, if I don’t do those even at this last moment, well... I won’t be able get away, would I? I don’t think so. And there seems to be some pretty heavy stuff this semester. Or else I'm getting stupid. Either way, I have to put in more efforts now. So adieu, notepad. See you soon enough though!! ;)

Scribbles: 25th November, 2005

Sometimes in life we are never sure. Its a paradox. If you do, you will probably wish that you hadn't done it, but if you don't, you will again wonder later that perhaps you should have done it. And there is no solution - in no way can you evaluate the two alternatives.

Isn't it inevitable that if you do your best to decide in such a situation, you will eventually only make it worse? Will not your thinking more and more about the 'what if's ultimately haunt you proportionally about the 'other' alternative, after you have chosen one alternative? And yes - if you have the third alternative of not choosing any of the courses of action, it will give you a boolean outcome - either you will be totally happy about this, or you will be totally repentant that you didn't go for either choices. I wish someone could provide me direct solutions to these problems.

But let me pause a minute here... didn't I myself have perfect answers to these questions 4-5 or more years back? I surely did. What were those answers? Why cant I remember them now? I had pretty substantial answers to such matters, and they somehow did held ground, and people (the "wise" ones too: pun intended) did agree to those. So, in spite to all these, what has happened to them? How come they are no longer? How come such solid theories get shaken off, in spite of statistical findings having supported them all the times...? What am I learning or unlearning? And why?

About Anne Frank's Diary

A few days ago, I once again got my hands on the book - Anne Frank's Diary. Having forgotten the exact words of a quote which had touched me very deeply, I had been desiring to obtain this book for quiet some time. At last, I got it from a friend who had come down from Hyderabad, and I could have it for only one night. Though I was thoroughly tired that day, I spent quiet some time that night reading extracts from various parts of that book.

I count this book as one of the best I have ever read considering that it was written by girl about 14 years old! The utter simplicity and the simple yet obvious rationale of many observations she makes, which seemingly are missed by many adults (both now and then), is amusing, surprising and satirical. There is an excellent sense of satirical humour throughout. Also, at many places, she makes some simple statements which actually goes very deep into some of the very rare truths, and which digs out some deep human psychology. Also, she has absolute honesty in her writings and an educated acceptance of her true self, which are very rare and appreciable qualities, and which draws respect from me, myself knowing how hard both of these are from my own experiences, and also how rare.

I wonder about the writings she would have produced had she grown up and lived. I'm sure they would have contributed to the literary world - I kind of miss them.

Patchwork For Last Post

Disclaimer: This attempt to write is for no reasons at all, except to put some better and (hopefully) more coherent materials at the top of my blog, rather than the last posting which now reads like a badly written disconnected meaningless text. I guess I'm loosing my writing skills day by day. My spoken skills being below the adequate mark, I took console over my written skills, but will those too be gone now?? Hope not. I Hope its just a temporary affair:

"I pray to god that it wont be long..." (courtesy: Madonna).

Ok, so I have been listening to lot of Madonna songs lately, and have been influenced by some of her lyrics. But at least, she has got some lyrics. Most of the others these days just shout out rubbish at the top of their voices. They sound like frustrated bunch of guys bitten by dogs yelling back at the (poor) dogs. I wonder how they would sound without the special audio effects, enhancements and instrumentals!

That's enough of text to serve my current purpose - patching my blog. Lets hope this text reads ok after maybe a day when I come back and go through this!!