Wednesday, March 12, 2008

On Parting

Today, I came across an older post of mine, a single short paragraph, which I saved as draft but had never posted. I'll put it up now, just as it is:

Sometimes, very rarely, people would come into your lives, and through seemingly inconsequential everyday commanilities would touch some unknown depths in your soul - without you ever being aware of it - and then leave, stunning you into the abrupt realisation that the person had somehow become a wholesome part of your vision of life. A realisation you never had until the time of depart. And then, you watch - watch in stunned astonishment and painful silence - as the moments of the parting unfolds - as if some unreal scene is being played out on the celluloid.

Freedom: Defined by Tagore

What is freedom? What is the ideal free state? What state of environment is 'heaven'? These are eternal questions which have been, through ages, drawing out human endeavours for satisfactory answers.

Tagore has defined freedom, and the state of 'heaven' stemming from this freedom, excellently in this poem:

Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high
Where knowledge is free
Where the world has not been broken up into fragments
By narrow domestic walls
Where words come out from the depth of truth
Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection
Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way
Into the dreary desert sand of dead habit
Where the mind is led forward by thee
Into ever-widening thought and action
Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake.


I find that very appropriate. That is true freedom - freedom culminating in a truly progressive society, a society celebrating, and living by, the human magnificience and excellence in its highest aspects.

Justification of Dreams?

Dreaming is easy. Everyone can dream. Desire is easy. Everyone desires.

But to make even the least possible effort, even if a miniscule, towards the practical realisation of the dream, is what will make all the difference.

Thoughts like whether or not traversing the whole path will really be feasible, about all things which 'might' occur to obstruct you, etc - and all such defensive thoughts - will only pull one down, without ever giving any proper solution.

There is only two vital questions to ask oneself - do I really want this, do I truly desire this? Is there anything I can do right now, which would not render me in some irrecoverable position, and which would take me, even if by a miniscule fraction, towards the realisation of this dream?

If the answers to both of these are 'yes', what more is really there to wait for?

Often, we try to justify to others our actions towards the object of our desire, in a perspective in which the other person might understand it - might see it as proper, right or natural from his perspective. And in trying to do so, we get lost in a maze of words and thoughts. Of course, how could it be otherwise? Because, in our hearts, the truest justification of our pursual of that object is our own pure desire of that object, not its being 'proper' or 'right' or 'natural' in the eyes of others. (Now, our desire might have stemmed from such altrustic reasons - that depends upon the psyche - but the bottomline is that we do desire it.) And it needs no other, and would find no other, more proper justification for our pursual of it than our own pure wish and desire of it. Hence it follows that we would never be able to properly put it in same justification and light in which it would have been placed had it been explained away with its true justification - and it is only this justification which actually renders it, through a power of truth and simplicity, in more glory and magnanimousity than ever possible through any other justification.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Miss Mamata Banerjee and the Bengal Communists

A certain topic I was listening today among my friends about the 'lawlessness' of the current society, of the eroding security, and such issues, made my mind wander to politics and political personages. Of core politics, I'll say nothing in this article, since that is not my objective, but the chanced wandering of my thoughts to one of Bengal's political icons - Miss Mamata Banerjee, is what has triggered this article, and of her, and of her opposition – the Communists in Bengal, I shall key in my present thoughts.

I have never been an avid follower of politics. I had always in my past looked at the political headlines with a kind of bewilderment as to why such bureaucratic nonsense attains such importance, as to how come such clashes come up between those 'wise old men' in regard to the question of common good (about which, in my personal arena I had never seen such doubts among people regarding what is progressive and what is degressive), and how come people keep supporting such men after clearly seeing how far they deviate from what they are supposed to be doing, seeing how they get carried away like stupid thick-headed children about their own personal egos! But of course, bewilderment or not, you cannot live without being aware of what goes around, and such is my case. And it is through such slow indirect accumulation of the political accumen over the years, that the opinion I voice here has taken shape.

The Bengal political scenario is divided in two main camps - the 'Communists' (strictly just a proper noun these days) and the 'Congress' (I'm totally lost about the significance of the name) - or rather, 'Trinamul Congress' these days to be more precise. The Trinamul Congress front is led by Mamata Banerjee, and the Communist front is led by Jyoti Basu, Buddhadeb Bhattacharaya, and others.

For many decades, the ruling Communist party had been comfortably reigning over the state. However, the last decade saw some serious momentum being gained in the opposition camp, led by Mamata Banerjee. I have for long been listening (being the silent listener - seldom voicing, but always attentive) to supporters of both parties, to both their sides of arguments, about how the other is absolutely lost. And against Mamata Banerjee, a prevailing general opinion which I have gathered is that she is incapable of the position of Chief Minister - that she is 'absolutely ridiculous' in many of her actions. But before going into her as I see her, I'll write out something about the ruling party - the 'Communists' - with whom she is up against.

Who are these 'Communists' in Bengal? It is of no doubt that they had lost credibility and had ceased to be useful at least in the last decade. Anybody can see through it. Yet, why, and how exactly, did they retain their vote bank and support? A popular opinion is that its by 'rigging' and by force, but I refuse to believe that unless a party have a huge chunk of true support, it cannot, however strong its 'force' might be, gain the majority of votes. Yes, it might be able to change 40% to 50%, but even if it has 20% true support, that is quiet a formidable number.

And in my personal circle also, I have found quiet a lot of people truly supporting the party. However, in more recent times, the party has shown certain reforms, and the support opinions I have heard might have been due to this. Yet, then, how come the party stood through the last decade - when it looked really all lost?

The party, when it had started, had its root in novel ideas. It must have had true communism in the heart. Many people believed in it. And true communism effects that people help people. This 'standing out' for others must have grown widely practiced inside the party. The party members took and gave favors to others. This practice must have become widespread. And this giving and taking is what I think brew a very intricate chain of 'loyalty'. So that now, the people if they move away, they would feel troubled by consciousness. And the majority of youth of the 'then' times, having grown older by now, and having thereby lost the openness of mind which happens with age, would naturally find it more difficult to move out. Their mental loyalty chain inhibits them from displacement even when they must be seeing through the fallacies which have been as clear as daylight. And still when someone truly speak for the party, I think it is because their mind having created for their comfort a circle of justifying reasons, which the mind falls to believe much more easily, since such a belief would keep it more comfortable.

Fighting such a system is no trifle. And it is this opposition that Miss Mamata Banerjee is up against. And I think, it is her kind of nature - the one true to herself and others - which can put up with such a situation.

As I mentioned earlier, a general opinion against her is that she is incapable of the position of Chief Minister - that she is 'absolutely ridiculous' in many of her actions. This is probably true to some extent. It is true, that many things which she does are indeed futile. It is true that she might give out an image of not being the ideal politician who is always in control and witty. It might be that what she does suddenly might even harm her own party's vote bank. So, then, what is it with which she is formidably spearheading the intricate system of power which has been attained by the ruling party?

It’s her nature. She believes in what she does and says. She feels it. She lives a life true to herself and to others. And it is this quality, I think, which has gained her most of her aides. A rare quality, and a seductive one too. She lives a real life. She has true empathy. She is heavily toiled, yet she still goes on. And because of such truth, she actually make some profound simple observations, can actually see through injustice, recognise it more by feeling than by reason, when there is one and takes certain steps, which being very real and true, naturally finds support from the intellect and the masses. I believe, people would find it easier to stick to her, than to her political ideas. With her, people would feel secure. With her, they would be able to identify. With her, they would feel trusty. And these days, that is a huge incentive. It is with such qualities, and because of such qualities, I think, that she has been able to gather such momentum and loyal aides, and as long as she remains true to these, she will continue to find loyal support, no matter what she does.

I myself don’t know whether I'd support her ideals or not, but I would gladly help her personally if ever she needs such help.

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Scribbles: 12th August, 2007

I am stranded. I need a personal computer. Its difficult to make blog posts within the limitations of a cafe. I need an environment and time to write. I do. I am not so proficient as to be able to compose stuff within five-ten minutes. I need to think, to type, to make corrections, etc etc - before I post something which says anything. Also, the computer will enable me to finish some unfinished tasks, like my project. I'll probably invest in a laptop this time - when my finances improve a little. Until then.....

Monday, July 02, 2007

Can you give someone half his life?

Today I did a very stupid and negative thing. You cannot give a man half of his life. I tried to do something just like that.

While returning from office today, as I was walking, a group of about 4-5 persons - 2 men and 2 women with children, approached me. They were a poor bunch, shabbily dressed, with the rough and haggard look that fate usually bestows them with. "Aap Hindi samajhte hai?" (Do you understand Hindi?), one of the men asked. I looked up with surprise and nodded hesitantly with an inquisitive frown on my forehead. And he started speaking - in quiet a flow. I could not follow his accent properly, but what he was saying amounted to something like them having come from some distant place, and now being in deep trouble with no money. This was all that I could make out with my intent listening. So I guessed that they were looking for monetary assistance, and hesitantly and doubtfully asked about how much they needed.

Obviously, while listening and making out their intention of monetary assistance, I was quiet at loss about what to make of the situation. On one hand, I thought they might actually be in trouble, while on the other hand, I was extremely defensive and considered the notion of them cheating me. However, now as I sit and write this, the consideration that they might have cheated me seems less probable, and that makes the matter more worse.

Anyways, on that spot I kept hesitating. I mean, I wanted to help if they were actually in trouble, but the defensive and fearful side of me kept urging me to just walk away, from fear of being cheated. And then I did this stupid and negative thing. I decided to go halfway. I offered them only fifty rupees. And took leave.

Even while giving away the fifty rupees, I was very conscious that I might be cheated. But even if there was a small chance that they are true, I had decided to go along with that. I had consciously chosen this, being fully aware of the risks. But there was yet this dark spot in what I had done, as I very soon came to realise. As I walked on, the whole episode occupied my thoughts and kept making me feel somewhat uneasy. And about 10-15 minutes later, as I started seeing more clearly, I felt kind of ashamed of myself. The reason being, that even when I had decided to believe and go along with the positive, I could not do that whole-heartedly. I was bogged down by my negative side. By fear, by defences. Things that always pull you down. I could easily have parted with 2-3 hundred more without making any difference for me. That might truly have helped them. But I was simply afraid to do that. Afraid of being cheated. It was plain fear. That is how I failed myself - by giving in to fear.

Well, I hope I take a lesson from this. Someone I have come to know recently had said a very nice thing a few days back - "What you don't need, give away. Don't horde." Maybe I'll be able to follow on some day.

Friday, June 29, 2007

Stationed in Bangalore

Having abstained too long from blogging, I'll just make a hurried post in here. I'm in Bangalore now, this city being designated as my training location by Wipro Technologies. I'll be stationed here for three months - after which my location of posting will be Pune, as I had opted. I had opted for Pune in a wish to visit and experience some different place (having stayed in Bengal - primarily Kolkata - for 1/3rd of my life), and I'm lucky at getting to visit two cities in one go.

Anyways, Bangalore is a nice city, but the biggest problem here is the language. And I have no idea that by what stretch of reasoning they put up the names of the terminal places in the buses only in the local vernacular! Even the route numbers appear only in the local language in some of the buses!!

The Wipro campus is quiet impressive. The fact which startled me most was that it is protected by an electric fence. Never in my life have I seen any corporate office being protected by an electric fence. Being curious, I had raised the question in the brief security session we had on the first day, and the instructor had replied something like "it is to keep others from jumping into the Wipro campus"!!! What crap - even prisons don't employ electric fences! I wonder how sensitive the data is, if it is solely for data protection that they are employing this thing. Or probably being a global company, they also have additional threats from fanatic terrorist groups.

Well, maybe more on this later. Presently, I'll conclude this writing here as I am running out of time.